On the quest to be unbreakable.: Archive

So while I'm shucking oysters Dan tells me.

“You might find a baby crab in some of them.” All I think is that its gonna be some microscopic thing. Well I found one, and it was the size of a fucking penny. It’s named Kirby, it was brought into the world at 6:30 on new years eve, and were fucking keeping it. I’ll put up a picture later of the weird fucker.

Jan 1st

People who work in the food service industry,

Should probably stop complaining and find a new job. Jesus fuck.

Dec 31st

Dec 30th

13 notes

Dec 30th

5,364 notes

crudematter asked: I'm going to a party and then some rave thing on New Years. Not my cup of tea, but it will do. This will be the first year I really have no one to kiss. Might just kiss Jazmine at midnight.

Dec 30th

You had my hand in your hand, You had my lip in your teeth, You had my heart on your sleeve, You had a chance to breathe.

Dec 30th

6 notes

Dec 30th

369 notes

Dec 30th

44,286 notes

Dec 27th

3,300 notes

Dec 27th

17,592 notes

Click it, join it, save money on some seriously... →

Dec 26th

Dec 25th

27 notes

Dec 25th

107 notes

Dec 25th

3,274 notes

3 tags

So you can't buy booze after midnight on Christmas...

What the fuck am I supposed to do? Be sober?

Dec 25th

Anonymous asked: Have you ever considered attending an AA meeting?

Dec 24th

I have the best boss/chef/friend ever.

$200 christmas bonus, a shirt with kanji that reads “I love alcohol”, and beat by dre headphones. Best human being on the planet.

Dec 24th

2 notes

Perks of working a 200 degree kitchen.

Smoking outside while it’s snowing.

Dec 23rd

1 note

Dec 19th

190 notes

Dec 19th

313 notes

Dec 19th

4 notes

reblog if you're a mistletoe virgin.

herewecome-reachforyourgun: konfessyon: Not a single kiss under the mistletoe.

Dec 19th

28,783 notes

leviathanwakes:

Dec 19th

105 notes

Dec 19th

3,362 notes

Coopers Christmas.

Its on netflix instant. It’s fucking great, it’s dark, wrong, and hilarious.

Dec 19th

1 note

1 tag

Dec 19th

1 note

Dec 19th

209 notes

Dec 19th

741 notes

Dec 18th

312 notes

What a buzz kill.

I finally get behind the wheel of a MK1 Golf and the chick who owns it has never taken care of it. I wanted it so badly and now I’m just so discouraged. Fuck.

Dec 18th

Anonymous asked: CHANTZ HAS A SMALL WEENIE

Dec 17th

Anonymous asked: You're a fucking idiot.

Dec 16th

Haters just hatin.

You mad hater?

Dec 15th

Reason 1086 to not work in a kitchen if you're a...

Molten hot carmel fish sauce that splatters all over the place, including your hands and forearms.

Dec 15th

Dec 13th

12 notes

Dec 13th

5,089 notes

Put a “hi” in my ask & I’ll answer:

bornintohate: sdunc: snakesovchrist: danimalgrrl: 1. First impression: 2. Truth is: 3. How old do you look: 4. Have you ever made me laugh: 5. Have you ever made me mad: 6. Best feature: 7. Have I ever had a crush on you: 8. You’re my: 9. Name in my phone:

Dec 13th

30,990 notes

Anonymous asked: I want to suffocate you.

Dec 13th

I can depress a whole bar by playing Brand New and...

Some old guys just got up and left saying “this shit is too depressing for a irish bar.”

Dec 13th

My boss likes Mumford and sons.

I knew he was semi cool.

Dec 12th

Anonymous asked: honest opinions on mallori wing ? haley lamson ? kaity gardiner ?

Dec 12th